(no subject)

For some reason, whenever i try to look at my friends pages (which is all i do now cos i'm too lazy to post) my internet explorer shuts down. It only happens when i click on 'friends'- if anyone (anyone who still reads this, that is) knows why this might happen- please share your wisdom cos its annoying!!!
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    cranky cranky

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i fucking hate technology. i actually *paid* to download music and now i cant burn that music onto a CD cos itunes is a c**t. so essentially its all useless to me cos i spend more time in my car or at work listening to music than on this shitbox mind fuck of a machine. why would i want to sit at my computer to hear it? HUH? HUUUUUUH?

thats a whole hour of my life i'll never get back.

Week11 peer Review: Neillmorgans post 29/09 1:55pm

This review is in response to all the hostility that has taken over livejournal the past few weeks. The religion debate is one that I guess will never be avoidable ans im surprised it has taken us two years of live-journalling before the arguments began. I believe in the right to free speech but I don’t believe in the need people feel to judge each other and criticise their beliefs. But I guess then that I’m being critical of others desire to criticise and have an opinion… ahh vicious cycle. Anyway, I was looking at neill morgans  (neillmorgan ) response to the clash between mitch (mitchobrien)  and timb ( dr_mindbender82 brought on by timb’s posting of ‘explicit’ material on his journal. My own opinion is that timb was justified in including this image as supportive material for his poem- I think its ridiculous that in a society thats saturated with the commercialisation of sex, something most people don’t even flinch at, timb gets slandered for his personal response using a picture that he has manipulated to PROVE A POINT. Neil begins his post with a satirical ‘warning label’, his tongue-in-cheek response to the topic of censorship. His post makes an interesting comparison to censorship laws in the states- art vs. porn. I think whats most valid about his argument is the implications of such a debate. if as part of a small community based in livejournal, we can’t appreciate the art in context of a fellow student, then the resulting hostility can be transported on a much wider scale- or if we don’t get along with those closest to us, and appreciate their perspective, how can we expect to appreciate the wider world? Neils final statement made me think of blake and the mind forg’d manacles im always talking about- Neil believes that as human beings we wilfully become blind to the truth, to the darker side of the human condition, for it is a reality and it does have the capacity to makes us LOOK at this reality differently. Timb doesn’t deserve to be crucified for his work, however left-of-field it may be. To judge without open-mindedness is to chain ourselves to reason and rationality, that which blake was most opposed.

week 10 peer review-petetucker: [18 Sep 2006|06:43am]

bIn his post, Pete highlights some of the connections between Blake and Whites work. He finds that some of writing in The Riders in the Chariot parallels the characters in The Visions of The Daughters of Albion. I found this really interesting and Pete does a good job of backing up his ideas with quotes. Pete compares Blakes ‘The eyes see more than the heart knows” to White’s “"...but their minds embraced almost nothing of what their flickering eyes saw.” And he also likens the concepts of these two phrases to Blakes ‘London’.  I found this really provocative because White, like Blake explores the power of the senses and the power of the mind. One might simply call Whites sentence the power of denial but he could also be drawing on the notions of the visionary- as humans with five senses, we receive information from the external world and process it with our brain, but then there’s the potential for seeing beyond this, beyond the borders of the senses and embracing the ‘fourfold vision’ that Blake knew. In his post, pete uses Theotormon as an example of the negative effects of a closed mind or of the “mind forg’d manacles” that Blake believed we could impose on ourselves. Pete also notes the connection between Oothoon and Miss Hare- their ability to push past the boundaries of the self- the senses, and the external world, society and experience a sense of freedom.  

Week 9: Peer Review- Daniel_gleeson 15/09/06-1:45pm

 For something different this week, I’m reviewing Danielgleesons untitled poem posted on 15/09. Daniel’s poem skilfully and  uniquely comments on a range of issues that are relevant to our study of literature this semester- both Blake and White, those pf which are issues also of the wider world. Thematically, the poem delivers on the repetitiveness of our lives and constructions of society that are amplified due to our human tendency to conform. Actually, I’m unsure about whether conformity can only be classified as a human trait- so many animals must conform to packs and hierarchy’s forming some sort of natural order based on survival instincts- whenever I see those nature documentaries it is more often than not, the animal that strays from its pack that is targeted by predators. For alone, the animal is prey, it is single ‘solitary’ like white’s characters Miss Hare, Mrs Godbold, Himmelfarb and Dubbo. These characters have either consciously or unconsciously become separated from society, from the rigid tradition and discriminating culture (or, alternatively, as Daniel states in his poem, “the Bandwagon”) that crucifies them (himmelfarb literally) for this behaviour. They are watched and hunted and maliciously slandered for being outsiders by the beasts who are hungry to persecute. Daniel conveys these issues through his inclusion of dialogue that occurs between a child and his parents-we see that they may be the ultimate masters of our identities, who perhaps control the way we interact with outside world. The line “A lack of concrete stimuli (a lack of dirty nails) tempts me to leave” reminds me of Miss Hare, whose own stimuli is drawn from nature, and if she cannot be rooted to the earth in all its beauty and power, if she cannot be close by digging deep (and getting ‘dirty nails’), she cannot survive. Nature is her life source. The middle stanza of the poem is complex, owing to its conveying the formulaic nature of our lives, the rational, mathematical way of thinking and way of existing that ultimately brings structure, routine and conformity to a life that he believes is ‘addictive’. Perhaps this addiction is what brings us comfort in lives that might otherwise appear meaningless. I picture the chartered streets of London, the stacked, numbered, replicated and valuated shelves of consumerism, the order of churches, of worship, of dogma regurgitated every sunday- all constructs that we have forged to give us a sense of place and belonging.

Daniel’s  piece  proves to us that  poetry can break this cycle. He has thrown conformity out the window using visual (unusual stanzas, the use of the asterix,the parentheses and bolding text) and linguistic techniques that are a step outside of  the box of the ordered, the mundane.


week 8 Review: jamescrino

This week James  jamescrino compared a lyric from U2 to Blake’s and White’s perspective of the senses and the role of language in our world. James briefly outlined that words often fail us, even when we might have a ‘perfect thought, feeling, sensation’. By grasping at a way of expressing these thoughts and feelings through words, we often destroy it. Often these feelings aren’t translatable into words and it is clear that White agreed with Blake’s statement. White uses his character Miss Hare to illustrate his opinions and in fact, the shortcomings of trying to express these. For Hare, sensation and connection with nature is the consummate explanation for anything she experiences. As a youth, Miss Hare was expected to be silent, and she was not supposed to be clever- seen and not heard. As an adult, Miss Hare is very much the product of this upbringing. She cannot express what is most deeply within her even though she feels it with intensity. For White, however, this doesn’t seem to be a shortcoming…she was “supposed to be simple. Still, there were always a great many things [she] was able to understand”. Perhaps owing to her troubled upbringing, Miss Hare developed a different way of looking at things and an affinity with nature that finds her able to see things in a different light. When she looks intimately at Himmelfarb, she sees intensly and feels rather than speaks. In people, as in nature, Hare can see the extraordinary in the ordinary…

week seven ...

i found Oothoons view of the lot of women pretty disturbing because it reminded me so much of my mothers attitude to life. For years she's been telling me to get a degree get a degree get a degree coz then i'll never have to rely on a MAN (heaven fuckin forbid) to be able to exist. she has this man sized chip on her shoulder because she was reduced to living the life that clearly she didnt want, forced into marrying my dad cos she fell pregnant with my brother and then proceeded, despite her increasing unhappiness, to pop out three more children. i cant imagine how my parents even came to be together because they are the most different people and look at the world in like completely polar ways. my mum is so highly strung, assertive in that 'dont you ever fuck with me' sense, while at the same time idolising mr calm spiritual other wordly dalai lama, meanwhile my dad is seemingly calm, softly spoken and passive. he will do anything for anyone as long as its not his immediate family. his passivity shits me to tears. anyway, i think its obvious by now that my parents arent together anymore, they do, however, live in the same house which i know is weird but it was kinda necessary. WAS being the operative here. anyway, i think my mum puts so much shit on me because she never got to go to uni, being an immigrant to Australia at twelve she lived on hostels in cabramatta, by the time she was fifteen she 'd left high school and was working in offices in the city and travelling back and forth from the western suburbs for four hours a day. that was the thing people did back then, people from this area, new arrivals to australia anyway. anyway, her first marriage was at 17 and in my opinion she took that option so she could escape her own fathers wrath and gain some independance. why is every woman in my family always running from men? my aunty has had similar experiences- now with her third husband in her past she's been driven to substance abuse to deal with abusive no hoper husbands. i guess they were conditioned to accept the reality that men dominate, men provide, and women do what theyre told. while my mum struggled to look after four children under five on a daily basis, my dad would fuck off to work and not come home til 2 in the morning. let me say, that hasnt changed. there is this masculine thing that men need their space and well, they always seem to get it. we now joke and say that hes with his 'other family'.. who knows, it could be true. i know nothing about my dad and its not like hes an 'absent' father in the conventional understanding of the term. 

so my point in writing all of this, is that Blake was spot on, and continues to be. for many, marriage= slavery. i dont think that people deliberately perpetuate this reality, i just think that despite the fact that women have advanced to such a huge degree in terms of their rights, alot hasnt changed. we still carry the fucking load on our shoulders,and i know even just in my own family that this is what is silently 'expected'. while i work at the family business up to 6 days a week my younger brother shits all over everyone and does exactly what he wants to do while everyone kisses his arse. i am now the product and perpetuator of this  vicious fucking cycle and i only hope that i can be the one to stop this wheel from spinning to no end. 

heres a coversation that took place on messenger  between me and my male friend dro while i was writing this post:


why are men so fucked
dro:cos women r even more fucked
me:no, we're just as fucked
dro: ok but women r fucked AND annoying
me:how so
dro:  u'll never understand ur a woman

mood:  pissed OFF

week seven

my personal thoughts in response to the other comments on camheartsamber 's question on acudiscuss...
the hypothetical...
If you discovered some earth shattering truth, that would change everything the people in the world believed, would you tell them? Or would you let them continue on with their lives...

everyone elses arguments need to be read before mine makes sense but ill just slap it here anyway///

isnt it the universal truth that everyone wants to be 'saved?'. no one wants to find out that their life is meaningless, even if we do explicitly say 'this is all nothing' even if we are opposed to any notions of God or the afterlife. hands up whos comfortable with the fact that you'll be six feet under or burnt into dust some day? or are all of these ideas simply self-indulgent western middle class slightly educated mutterings that are, in fact meaningless when it all comes to that final breath? the truth is relative to the beholder of said truth, as is meaning.

to those of you who think our lives are meaningless... do you think you live your life differently?

jeez i can rant and rave...

mood:  cynical

commentary week 6: dr-mindbender82's post- [16 August 2006 @ 10:04 pm]

i've been reading alot of Timbs  posts lately. i think its amazing that i attend the same teeny tiny uni as him and i have never ever seen him anywhere (ive seen a photo on his journal though). Anyway, from my reading im in awe- Timb is an extremely intelligent, talented guy who has had to deal with a lot of shit growing up and even now at uni. this might be a little strange to some people- but i can see a lot of parallels between timb and writers of the past who have conscoiusly or unconsciously lived on the fringe. Like Blake, Timb feels as though he cannot connect with many members of society, or in this instance, our literature community, on the same level. I think the problem is that, whilst many of us understand and enjoy our work at uni, we dont really appreciate the privelege of being there. I have to admit that with all of my responsibilities outside of uni, i have become a slave to everything that Blake was against. the shackles of conformity and capitalism and not following my own heart. Timbs video poem, he states is 

"about frustration, and agitation, evident in the shudders and flicker of the camera. It’s about feeling trapped in a barren landscape of meaningless clichés that is language, and being unable to find expression for something, which causes the frustration and agitation. It’s about looking for new ways to define something you can’t define because our lives, feelings and expressions have all been stereotyped through media into a kind of sub-reality that on the surface seems quite real, but deeper than that is simply meaningless."

i think that it is also a metaphor for the frustration Timb might be feeling about university. about the lack of interest of others and the lack of stimulation they provide. it saddens me to admit that, despite the fact that our minds have been opened up to the TRUTH about this world, to the shitty, raw, fucked up TRUTH, most of us will never do anything to change that. Timb has an enthusiasm that is infectious and i cant imagine why anyone would come down on him for what he does, all i can think is that theyre narrow minded and threatened in some way. 

in the comments of his post,Timb reflects on the way we have become mindless slaves to the english language (like Orwells essay that we looked at in 2nd year). he raises a number of points about human society's "progress", about how widsom, knowledge and the quest for enlightenment have been traded for the material, the quest, rather for the bigger and better, newer and shinier. has post modernism actually hindered us and prevented the possibility of extending ourselves? are we living to some base, cliche, formulaic preconceived movie script telling us when, why and how? 

we looked at 'apathy' last year, and again this all ties together- why arent we as educated, passionate young students rebelling against the status quo? against this nonchalant, lethargic, brain dead, stagnant society? Or are we missing something? i had a discussion with one of the teachers on prac about stereotyping, and i was wondering why my all-girl-year 10 english class hadnt written letters speaking out against the stereotyping of women in a task i gave them, rather, they thought that to change this traditional way of representing women would make people 'confused' or 'uncomfortable'. i was dumbfounded. i asked this teacher what she thought, and she pointed out that there is such a generation gap these days that kids dont realise that for a woman to be at uni or to hold a certain position at a job is anything significant. they are so USED to these things being the norm that any insight into the struggle that took place for us to get there is rendered insignificant. So maybe thats just what the problem is, we at uni are all so preoccupied with what is happening day by day- work,assessments,social life-family that attempting to do anything would seem futile. i am so exhausted living my daily life and fulfilling my responsibilities to those around me that to take on the world seems like stuff of the imagination. i wish things were different. maybe we might not change the world but there is some hope gamboge in his comments states that: "sometimes we do just escape into our own sphere and it is then that the true creative spirit overrides all the bulshit, clichés, foreign agendas, and lies. Poetry is the language of the soul. Poetry empowers us." . now someone else deem this statement as cliche, but there is truth undeniable in so few words.


mood:  exhausted